The Morning After the Night Before
by Miss Jordan
Summary: Edward wakes up to an unfortunate situation that could cost him a whole lot. Bella stumbles into the living room of a man who she wouldn't let touch her in a million years ... sober. Now both are stuck with each other and it's all they can do to try and get along. All human, canon pairs. Rated M for future lemons & language.
1. Preface

**The Morning After the Night Before**

**Preface**

I opened my eyes. _Woah_. I closed them again pretty damn quickly. My mouth was as dry as cotton wool and my head was pounding. I think the phrase 'pissed as a fart' was pretty conclusive of my night. Honestly, I've said this numerous times, but I will never, _ever_ drink again. And this time, I mean it.

I risked opening my eyes again, this time just a small crack and started when I saw the legs entwined over mine on the bed. _Oh no_. No, no, no, no, no, no. This cannot be happening to me.

I was being so good, just to win this stupid bet and now, I've blown it in one stupid night. I was so busted. Unless … I could leave now and no one would ever know. This girl, well she probably wouldn't remember ever having met me and Emmett, well he's probably at some girl's house without even realising where I ended up. I could just pretend that I ended up at home, tucked up safe in my bed.

Yes, that's what I'm going to do. My plan is set. I lifted my head up to try and manoeuvre my way out from this girls grip and I froze. She stirred beneath me. _Shit_.

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	2. Chapter 1

**Chapter 1**

Keeping my eyes closed, I tried to move around subtly. I had no idea where I was but I knew that I wasn't going to like it. I remembered … well, not a lot really but enough odd snippets to remember that I wasn't in my own bed, or even my own town really.

I felt hot breath on my neck and went rigid. _Oh crap_. This could not be happening to me. Rosalie would not let me live this down. Virgin of the week hadn't worked well for me. Two hours actually.

Sneaking a glance, I saw a head of bronze, sex hair and if I let my eyes wander a little further down. _Wow_. Well, maybe forgoing virgin of the week until our next holiday may have been a better idea. Who wants to waste what little time we have here on being all holy than thou anyway.

He began to stir. I squeezed my eyes shut and prayed that he skipped out before I had to. Yes, he was moving. Dammit. I'm in his bed. He groaned. Well that was rude. I mean, I may be no Beyoncé but I was certainly a 7 or 8 on any man's scale. At least I didn't think I was worth a moan of disproval. No, Bella. Stay calm. Don't open your mouth. It isn't worth it. No, no, no – Shit, too late.

"Excuse me?" Uh oh, sassy Bella was out, "I mean, I may be no Rachel McAdams or whoever floats your dishevelled boat but you're no stunner yourself" Blatant lie. "I'll have you know that any man would be lucky to have me – yourself included!" Rose was not going to believe this guy.

"Listen, Short stuff. I can do better than you, trust me, because I have. Don't be throwing luck around because there's no such thing. Trust me, I know. I ended up in bed with you didn't I?"

I shrieked in anger as we both jumped out of bed and began hastily yanking our clothes on.

"Exactly, you ended up in bed with me. That should be enough to prove luck to you right there. Not many guys get the pleasure of such a charming person as myself!"

"This is you being charming?" He raised his brows as he yanked his shirt over his head. "Not that I haven't had a great time," He muttered sarcastically, "But I'm going to leave now and leave your bed to suffer the pain of that face."

"Why you little –" Wait, _what_? "Sorry, what did you say?"

"I said, I'll leave your bed to suffer-"

"Aha!" He startled. "That right there! This isn't my bed." His scowl dropped and he just stared at me.

"What do you mean?"

"Sorry, shall I speak English for you? I do not own nor rent nor even know about this bed, I thought it was yours?" He shook his head, running a hand through his hair. Oh my. He had long, slender fingers with perfect big hands. No, focus Bella. Now is not the time for your mind to wander, especially to that topic.

"But, but, it's not mine!" He sounded exasperated now.

"Well, whose is it then?"

We then got our answer. The door flew open and a tall, lanky blonde walked through with his arm wrapped around a five foot nothing pixie who looked like she had just walked off a catwalk.

"Oh, hey, you guys are up!" I looked at the bronze God and he looked back. Nope, neither of us had a clue.


End file.
